Stop WhYYYYYing!

Odds are that if you have more than one child, you have one of these WHYYYYING? children. You know, they are the ones who start talking especially young and before you know they have gone from saying, "momma, dadda" to "Y can't I have juice?" "Y can't I have her toy?" "Y are you grumpy?" "Y is this toast so black?" "Y can't I stay up later?" And on and on and on and on... They even have the gull to say things like, "Y?" when you tell them they can't ask any more "Y" questions. I would tell this one child, who we won't name, "Okay, this is it, you can ask 3 more "Y" questions and then you have to take a 15 minute break." "Why?" she would ask. "Why can I only ask 3 more questions? How about 5?" Yikes!!!! This is the child that asked so many "Y" questions that by age 8 she was ready to take her driving test.

Do you ever have "Y" questions mommy? Do you ever feel like the Lord says, "No more whyyyying?" God never takes His eye off you, in fact, YOU are the apple of God's eye. He is waiting to spend time with you, to hold you, touch your worn out hands, soothe weary feet and mend broken hearts. In our frailities, we can't answer all of the "Y" questions. In God's wisdom, He doesn't answer all of the "Y" questions, but He never grows weary of listening, of hearing the thoughts of our heart. "I have called upon You, for You will hear me, O God; Incline Your ear to me, and hear my speech. Show Your marvelous lovingkindness by Your right hand, O You who save those who trust in You. From those who rise up against them. Keep me as the apple of Your eye; Hide me under the shadow of Your wings..." (Psalm 17:6-8)

• Spend some time with God, just visiting
• Revisit some prayer requests you set aside and BELIEVE for a miracle
• Don't grow weary of the "Y" questions, because some day...they will be all grown up answering "Y" questions of their own

Happy Mommying!

Carol Danna

www.thecornerstone.net

"Be the Miracle" A study through the book of John beginning September 21/22

Let Them Eat CAKE!

I'm no historian but this comment, "Let them eat cake!" has been attributed to Marie Antoinette. This woman was frustrated...and since this is no history lesson we will not get philosophical about the statement. But, every mommy can relate to being frustrated when it comes to feeding children. My first experience was with our oldest, who at about 1 year of age decided all she wanted was vanilla ice cream. Can ya' blame her? Now, you are talking to the mom who proudly breastfed and painstakingly made all of her first childs baby food from fresh vegetables and fruit. (Remember the 70's? smile). It was a battle and I was so frustrated. I asked my mom what to do, "Oh Wise One, what should I do?" She said, "Let her eat vanilla ice cream! In fact, give it to her morning, noon and night...until she is sick of it!" That was too easy and it worked, Within a couple meals, it was over. Once she realized all she was going to get was vanilla ice cream, even her little 12 month old brain went...hmmm, maybe some of mom's really yummie pears would be tasty too :-)

Make Mommying EZ by stepping back, taking a deep breath and reevaluate the tuff stuff:

• Build relationships with an "Oh Wise One" (we have a mentoring program here at Cornerstone called W2W...that's one way...they have them all over the country - ask around at church - if they are an Oh Wise One, every mom knows em')
• Really, breathe. That's it, just take a few deep breaths, you know, the kind you learned in your LaMaze or Labor Class (but forgot during labor and you just stared blankly at the nurse as if you had never heard of breathing exercises)
• Don't get stuck in a rut with difficult situations in mommying. Sometimes just trying a different approach changes everything.
• Pray for God's guidance. Remember, each of your children are created in God's image - He knows just how to work them and by nurturing your time with Him in prayer, you will receive much wisdom and guidance from the Holy Spirit.

Pass it On!

What goes around come around...that is the saying. Today, that did happen in our family. One of our daughters was having a stressful day and after loading some much "done" children as she puts it, in to the van, her 3 year old began singing, "I've got peace like a river, I've got peace like a river, I've got peace like a river in my soul." I had to laugh because this same mommy, now breaking in to a song of praise with her three little ones, during a time of stress, was the same little girl who told her mom, this mom, during a time of stress, "Come on mom, let's sing, Amen, Praise the Lord!"

This is the story...I was doing ANOTHER load of dishes in a very old, dilapidated church parsonage and about 5 months pregnant with our fourth child. Obviously, my countenance expressed the inward musings of my heart because our oldest daughter grabbed a pan and spoon and made her declaration. How could I deny my little ones the joy of praising God in the midst of difficulty as the scripture has taught? This is the principle my grandmother and mother taught me from birth and I had passed on this principle to our children, but now it was my TEST time. Yikes...was I going to crumble under the weight of my fleshly emotions or was I going to soar in obedience to the scripture to "bless the LORD at ALL times?" (Psalm 34) Thankfully, the spirit-person won out and we all grabbed our instruments of choice ranging from pots, pot lids, wooden spoons, and spatulas, whatever we could find. The joy of the LORD exploded in that little house and we had one of the best mommy days ever!

• Remember the Biblical truths you learned as a child and pass them on
• Don't forget to read the Word and practice what it says
• Be ready for spontaneous moments as a mommy so you do not miss out on the fun "God-moments" of your family life

"Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them."
Deuteronomy 4:9 NIV

Happy Mommying!
Carol Danna

www.thecornerstone.net

LIGHTEN UP

Such pretty little perfume bottles lined the shelf in our hallway closet. Our oldest daughter, a preschooler, just could not resist the shiny, glimmering containers. As I dusted I repeated, "Don't touch!" Typical of a preschooler, she continued to reach for the bottles and no amount of distractions or time outs repressed her desire to touch. It was a battle of wits, and why do mom's think they can match wits with a preschooler? We were both exhausted, she in tears, I in tears, we had met an impasse' and I had lost my temper. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. Mommy shouldn't of yelled at you." Her little arm wrapped around my back as we sat on the edge of the bed, "It's okay, Mommy, everyone has bad days." The tears really flowed from my eyes, as the guilt and shame lifted by these understanding and wise words. Out of the mouth of babes! Even she understood that sometimes we just need to LIGHTEN UP!

This is a Biblical Principle of great proportions. This truth is one of those "set free" promises. Paul says in Romans, "There is therefore no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:1) The translation of this word from the original language is 'damnatory sentence, condemnation'. The burden of our condemnation rests on Jesus as He took on Himself our damnatory sentence so that we could LIGHTEN UP! All of the guilt, shame and condemnation are best placed under His Righteousness. (Romans 5)

So, Mommying is Made EZ when we allow the Lord to free us from guilt, shame and condemnation. Here are a few steps to help establish some healthy patterns to over come condemnation:

• Know who you are in Christ (Psalm 139)
• Don't ignore warning signs that you are overloaded and being worn down by your sense of failures exposed by angry outbursts, fatique, depression, out of control behaviour, and moodiness
• Find a prayer partner and share your heart and ask for the Lord's help (Romans 8:26-27)
• LIGHTEN UP! Forgive yourself and start fresh
  

"Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning. Great is Your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:22-23

Happy Mommying!
Carol Danna
The Cornerstone Church
Anaheim, Ca

www.thecornerstone.net

Mommying Made a Little Easier

One of my daughters, the mother of an 18 month old and a 3 year old, just left our home, with two tired, one teething and one poked in the eye bundles of joy. As the 18 month old was crying on my lap, “hold me, hold me,” the other child was saying, “I want to go home, I want to go home.” I declared aloud, “the one who needs a nap and needs held is your mom!” Laughing aloud together, my daughter and I buckled the little tikes in their car seats and I sent them on their way.

Having raised five children, now all grown, and three parents themselves, I will NEVER forget those restless and LOOOONNNNNNG days, when it felt that the laundry was closing in, I would never feel rested again and that I was the most misunderstood person on the face of the earth!

Thankfully, as a testament of God’s grace, I can say that we all made it through growing up together and we are ‘mostly’ normal (whatever normal is…smile). I did learn a couple of things along the way and I hope these little gems will be a blessing to you as you raise your children and grow in marriage with your spouse.

1. Start EVERY morning with an “Attitude of Gratitude” to God with a whispered prayer, acknowledging God’s goodness and thanking Him for His help, protection, guidance and presence.

2. Hide the Word of God in your heart so that it flows through your mind and spirit throughout the day. My favorite is Deut. 33:27 “The Eternal God is my Refuge and underneath is His everlasting arms.”

3. Build patterns in your daily routine that become second nature such as:

• Throwing a load in the wash first thing in the morning, even if it means placing the completed load from the dryer on a counter or basket, but do not go to bed until it is folded and put away. If every day you do at least one full load of wash and drying, you will be surprised how you can at least keep a manageable system going with laundry.
• Keep the sink filled with water and detergent so that whenever you are done with a utensil, plate, pan, cup, etc., you just drop in the sink. We all hate scrubbing those grimy dishes so just knowing it is not grimy can be a great motivating factor for getting those dishes done before you go to bed.
• Prepare for the next day by setting out the clothing, including shoes, socks as well as what you will eat and need for breakfast.

Beginning the day with an attitude of gratitude, allowing God’s Word to dwell in you with richness and frequency and building patterns in to your routine can make a difference.

Tune in next time…”Do not be too hard on your self.”

Happy Mommy-ing…Carol Danna

The Cornerstone Women’s Ministry

www.thecornerstone.net